In the end of my yoga class today I had a vivid memory return of the night after Hamish was born. I was wide awake lying in the hospital bed full of adrenaline. I couldn’t sleep not even for a moment. The midwives gave me sleeping pills but they only helped me rest for a matter of minutes. I found out that they put you to sleep but don’t keep you there. So if your mind is still racing one hundred miles and hour then they don’t really work. I felt a soft hand on my face. Then I heard ‘Mummy it’s going to be ok, your going to be ok’. I knew it was Hamish reassuring me. He had left only a few days earlier from his body but his spirit was still so close to us. He wasn’t going to leave just yet. I know he stayed around us for a good eight months while we grieved. It was almost the moment when I felt pregnant again that he decided it was time for him to move on to a higher realm or vibration. I still feel him around me from time to time and I know he is our special guardian angel. He keeps us safe and is always watching over us.
I love you Hamish.
I Am Still Born 