When I drop into my heart space today it feels very confused. I feel so much lighter these days but now there is a new confusion. It is around where I am going. I am doing my best to walk down a path that is in true alignment. I also know walking this direction is not easy. I can make a choice to stay in my comfort zone or I can keep waking up each morning with more courage to step outside of it. I am choosing to step outside of it. I want to keep growing. The growth I have had in the last seven months is hard to compare to anything else I have ever been through in my life. I feel like giving birth to Hamish was also giving birth to a new me. I am getting to know that new me and I am trying each day to live a life full of joy. I am asking questions about whether everything in my life currently serves me in a positive way? I am pondering the meaning of life? I standing up for myself and what I believe in. I am doing my best to help those around me who are struggling or going through the same kind of thing. I know there is no perfect answer to any of the questions. I will keep asking them though. I will promise to live in Hamish’s honour and be true to myself always. Life is too short to live it half heartedly. I am all in on this rollercoaster ride and I am giving it all that I have.
Hamish I love you so much