Today we took a little road trip up the coast to see my little sister and have a family lunch at her place. It was so good to see her and know she is looking so healthy and well. My sister is 7 months pregnant and this has been so hard on her. Firstly, losing her nephew but then to also try and keep it together for her own family. She was feeling unwell last week so to see her all better means the world. I know she is worried for her own pregnancy after what we have been through. I think she is doing so well and I can’t wait to meet my new little niece or nephew shortly.
I also spend some time playing with my niece today whom is almost 2. She is growing fast and learning her words and sounds. She has the cheekiest smile you have ever seen. The most gorgeous blue eyes and white blond hair. I think about what Hamish would have been like at this age. I also think about how grateful I am to have my family around me during this time. My mum gives me a cardigan she had knitted for Hamish. It is dark blue with small possum buttons. I hold on to it wishing I could put it on him.
Hamish your bassinet is empty, your clothes unworn, your parents are lost wishing you would return. The soccer ball your Daddy wanted to kick around with you is waiting, your pram is ready to go. Why you had to leave us so early we will never know.