Day 207

Back in hospital for the first time since Hamish. I am feeling sore as the ear infection has been getting progressively worse all week. I am going to be on IV antibiotics for a day or two and they hope that it will get on top of it. I miss Hamish. Sitting in emergency overnight I have been watching the worried parents come through the doors so that their children can be looked at. It makes me think of him. I don’t get sick very often and being at the hospital makes me feel even sicker. It was the fact I couldn’t sleep and the pain was getting so bad that made me decide to come. I think Greg was also fed up from me moaning all night from the pain. They have diagnosed me with an infection in the cartilage of my ear and it’s good I came in as it has to be managed through IV antibiotics or it can get really bad. A lady sits across from me in the emergency department. We start chatting about life, love and children. I let her know about Hamish. She looks at me and says dear ‘I don’t think you will ever get over it’. Things will get better but your heart will always hold a little pain for your boy. I agree, I know things will get better though. Life has been great lately, but nothing or no one will ever replace Hamish.

I love you buddy. Please send me some healing love from above.

Author: Jodie Matthews

I am a mother, writer, mindful life coach, minimalist and many other things. I love mother nature. I am happiest when I am floating in the ocean. I am a keen traveller and love to explore and discover new places. You can connect with me further on instagram at @jodieleannematthews

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