I had so much fun today. It started with my monthly goddess circle catch up at a local cafe and ended with mud on my face at a peaceful Dam near the beach. I felt so supported by my goddess sisters knowing they all have my back. One of them mentioned how much I have softened in the last 5 months. How much I am coming into my true self. It’s hard to look back on my old life as I know so much of it wasn’t in alignment. My soul knew I wasn’t listening but my head pushed forward. It pushed me into working my ass off in the corporate world. It pushed me into representing 41,000 accountants in a Council. It pushed me to speak at events when I was sick and knew I should be in bed. It pushed me to go go go all the freaking time. It pushed me to try and be the best wife, friend, sister and everything else to everyone at the same time. There my soul was saying slow down. Listen to your body. Slow down you don’t need to work like this anymore. Slow down before you crash.
I didn’t want Hamish to leave. I wanted to take on motherhood and be the best mum I could be. Hamish has turned my life upside down. He has brought me to a big thundering holt. It’s like he put the brakes on my life and said ‘Mum! Enough is enough. You can’t go on like this anymore. You can’t ignore your souls calling. Even though you have been trying to follow that path for the last few years you have gotten off track. You need to learn how to say NO. You need to learn when to say YES. This life isn’t forever. You will never know when your time is up. Stop allowing others to drive your ship. Take hold of the sails and move in the direction you know you want to. Be the person you truly are. Don’t be sorry for being spiritual. Don’t be sorry for wanting the best for others. Just don’t try and fix them. All you need to do is stay on your path. And ‘In spirit’ you will inspire those around you. Keep going on this journey. I didn’t leave so you could go back to your old life. I didn’t leave to cause you pain. I wanted you to be who you are meant to Mum. Please listen and take my life as your reason to listen to your soul from now on. You may go off course now and again. Trust that you will always be supported and find your way. Trust that you will find so much happiness in taking a chance. Taking a leap. This is your time.’
Thank you Hamish you are my greatest teacher.