I woke up feeling good today. I can choose how I want to spend my time. I went to Pilates in the morning which was fun. I feel like moving my body and energy around helps keep me feeling happy. I know the days where I move less the energy in my body is stagnate. It feels a little more heavier. I’ve been able to do more exercise and I feel as though my body is starting to get stronger. Growing a baby has a big impact on your body. It changes your shape and moves muscles and organs around. I keep reminding myself to be kind to my body and allow it to slowly go back to its new shape.
Even though things didn’t work out for Hamish I am still so proud of what my body did to grow him for nine months. I know in my next pregnancy my body will also be strong and nurturing. It will be a safe place for my next bub to blossom before birth. It will be a warm cocoon filled with love. My next baby will also have a strong bond with Hamish. I know he will for sure. They are brothers for life. Next time my little one will have a chance at living outside of my womb. He will get to take his first breath and cry. He will get to go to school and live his purpose in life. He will get married and have children of his own. He will grow old and see his parents pass on. He will live a healthy and fulfilling life. He will know so much love surrounds him. I have a strong feeling it will be a ‘him’. I also know there is a daughter waiting for me but I think my next son will come first. Life will continue to thrive and Greg and I will be more in love than ever. I know we will get our happy ending.
Hamish you are going to be a great big brother.